Why do people create bonds with each other? Is it because people have a selfish nature and vie for the attention of others? Is it because when we are alone we get that feeling down in your heart that you don't like so you go to great lengths to try and suppress it by distracting yourself with the presence of others? Is it because, for one reason or another, we enjoy the way we feel when we're around others... The smiling... The laughing... The joy? Is it because it allows you to open up your feelings you were forced to keep inside?Why?
Why do people break bonds? Is it because they found someone better who they enjoy being with more and the other is no longer important? Is it because the person you had a bond with annoys you and you cease to enjoy their company? Is it because they hurt you in some way? Is it because you just moved on and they were stuck in the past? Why?
So many questions. No answers. Somehow in between loosing my first friend and my goth friend I started shutting myself out from the world. Hurt. Betrayed. You'd think I'd had given up on humanity, yet itt was still there... The desire to have bonds with others. To be remembered by them... Cared for by them... Loved by them... Why are those feelings still in my heart?
... You know what?
... Screw it.
I will keep building those bonds, I'll keep smiling, I'll keep spreading happiness wherever I go. Even if they spit in my face, laugh at me, ignore me, or break my heart. I don't know why, I can't tear my heart open and analyze why It keeps beating after being broken, but I know one thing: I loved that feeling. That feeling when someone suicidal thanks your for loving them despite their emotional state, that feeling when someone says thanks for being there for them when no one else was, the feeling when they say they love you like their own child....
So go ahead: break my heart. Stomp it into a million pieces. Forget I exist. Spit on me. Betray me. Ignore me. HURT ME. I don't care anymore. I'll still have those bonds even if you no longer do. And one day... I'll find that one bond where the other person feels the same and our bond can last both ways, forever...
its better to to love and loose than to never love at all.
And that's perfectly fine with me.